The Grammy-winning singer gets candid about her love life, dating struggles, and what she’s really looking for in a partner.
Victoria Monét has never been one to shy away from honesty, and her latest candid moment is no exception. During a recent appearance on Angie Martinez’s podcast IRL, the Grammy Award-winning singer pulled back the curtain on her dating life — and what she shared might surprise you.
According to Monét, dating women has been the more difficult road. Despite being open to relationships with both men and women, she says her experiences with women have left something to be desired — not because of a lack of attraction, but because of how she’s being approached.
She explained that women tend to engage with her on a purely physical or sensual level, focusing on her appearance rather than pursuing something with real depth or intention. For Monét, that’s a problem. She’s not looking for someone who’s just drawn to her image — she wants to be taken seriously as a partner.
What Victoria Monét Is Really Looking For
Beyond the surface-level frustrations, Monét was clear about what she actually wants in a relationship. Regardless of gender, she’s drawn to someone who brings masculine energy into the dynamic. She described feeling deeply in her feminine energy right now, and said that the right partner — male or female — would bring a balancing counterforce to that.
It’s not just about personal preference, either. As a mother, she expressed that having that kind of grounded, steady energy in the household matters for her daughter Hazel, born in February 2021.
Victoria Monét’s Path to Self-Discovery
Monét first came out publicly in 2018 via a post on what was then Twitter. The following year, she made her bisexuality even more explicit through her music. In her 2019 collaboration Monopoly, she sang plainly about her attraction to both women and men — a rare, direct moment of self-expression in an industry that often pushes artists to keep such things vague.
She also briefly dated fellow singer Kehlani, a relationship that gave fans a glimpse into her personal life before things quietly ended.
Life After John Gaines
The last serious relationship Monét was publicly known for was with fitness influencer and actor John Gaines, with whom she shares Hazel. Their split was first reported in late 2023, but the two didn’t make a formal public statement until September 2024 — nearly 10 months later.
In their joint announcement, the former couple emphasized mutual respect and a shared commitment to co-parenting. They acknowledged that personal growth was something each needed to pursue independently, and made clear that despite the end of the romantic relationship, they remain on good terms for the sake of their daughter.
What’s Keeping Victoria Monét Busy
As for why she’s still single? Monét says it comes down to priorities. Between completing culinary school and currently being on tour with Bruno Mars, her schedule hasn’t exactly left room for romance. But she’s not closing the door — she says she’s open to meeting someone when the timing feels right.
Victoria Monét on Her Own Terms
What makes this moment worth paying attention to isn’t just the candid commentary on dating — it’s what it says about where Monét is in her life. She’s a Grammy winner at the height of her career, a mother navigating co-parenting with grace, a newly minted culinary school graduate, and a touring artist sharing stages with one of the biggest names in music.
She knows exactly who she is and what she wants. Whether the right person — whatever their gender — is ready to show up and match that energy remains to be seen. But if her track record is any indication, Monét isn’t in a rush. She’s doing just fine on her own terms.
Source: Essence
